On Sheep, Sheepdogs, and Wolves
By Dave Grossman
One Vietnam veteran, an old retired colonel, once said this to me: “Most of the people in our society are sheep. They are kind, gentle, productive creatures who can only hurt one another by accident.” This is true. Remember, the murder rate is six per 100,000 per year, and the aggravated assault rate is four per 1,000 per year. What this means is that the vast majority of Americans are not inclined to hurt one another.
Some estimates say that two million Americans are victims of violent crimes every year, a tragic, staggering number, perhaps an all-time record rate of violent crime. But there are almost 300 million Americans, which means that the odds of being a victim of violent crime is considerably less than one in a hundred on any given year. Furthermore, since many violent crimes are committed by repeat offenders, the actual number of violent citizens is considerably less than two million.
Thus there is a paradox, and we must grasp both ends of the situation: We may well be in the most violent times in history, but violence is still remarkably rare. This is because most citizens are kind, decent people who are not capable of hurting each other, except by accident or under extreme provocation. They are sheep.
I mean nothing negative by calling them sheep. To me it is like the pretty, blue robin’s egg. Inside it is soft and gooey but someday it will grow into something wonderful. But the egg cannot survive without its hard blue shell. Police officers, soldiers, and other warriors are like that shell, and someday the civilization they protect will grow into something wonderful. For now, though, they need warriors to protect them from the predators.
“Then there are the wolves,” the old war veteran said, “and the wolves feed on the sheep without mercy.” Do you believe there are wolves out there that will feed on the flock without mercy? You better believe it. There are evil men in this world and they are capable of evil deeds. The moment you forget that or pretend it is not so, you become a sheep. There is no safety in denial.
“Then there are sheepdogs,” he went on, “and I’m a sheepdog. I live to protect the flock and confront the wolf.”…
If you have no capacity for violence then you are a healthy productive citizen, a sheep. If you have a capacity for violence and no empathy for your fellow citizens, then you have defined an aggressive sociopath, a wolf. But what if you have a capacity for violence, and a deep love for your fellow citizens? What do you have then? A sheepdog, a warrior, someone who is walking the hero’s path. Someone who can walk into the heart of darkness, into the universal human phobia, and walk out unscathed.
Let me expand on this old soldier’s excellent model of the sheep, wolves, and sheepdogs. We know that the sheep live in denial, which is what makes them sheep. They do not want to believe that there is evil in the world. They can accept the fact that fires can happen, which is why they want fire extinguishers, fire sprinklers, fire alarms and fire exits throughout their kids’ schools.
But many of them are outraged at the idea of putting an armed police officer in their kid’s school. Our children are thousands of times more likely to be killed or seriously injured by school violence than fire, but the sheep’s only response to the possibility of violence is denial. The idea of someone coming to kill or harm their child is just too hard, and so they chose the path of denial.
The sheep generally do not like the sheepdog. He looks a lot like the wolf. He has fangs and the capacity for violence. The difference, though, is that the sheepdog must not, cannot and will not ever harm the sheep. Any sheepdog who intentionally harms the lowliest little lamb will be punished and removed. The world cannot work any other way, at least not in a representative democracy or a republic such as ours.
Still, the sheepdog disturbs the sheep. He is a constant reminder that there are wolves in the land. They would prefer that he didn’t tell them where to go, or give them traffic tickets, or stand at the ready in our airports in camouflage fatigues holding an M-16. The sheep would much rather have the sheepdog cash in his fangs, spray paint himself white, and go, “Baa.”
Until the wolf shows up! Then the entire flock tries desperately to hide behind one lonely sheepdog.
The students, the victims, at Columbine High School were big, tough high school students, and under ordinary circumstances they would not have had the time of day for a police officer. They were not bad kids; they just had nothing to say to a cop. When the school was under attack, however, and SWAT teams were clearing the rooms and hallways, the officers had to physically peel those clinging, sobbing kids off of them. This is how the little lambs feel about their sheepdog when the wolf is at the door.
Look at what happened after September 11, 2001 when the wolf pounded hard on the door. Remember how America, more than ever before, felt differently about their law enforcement officers and military personnel? Remember how many times you heard the word hero?
Understand that there is nothing morally superior about being a sheepdog; it is just what you choose to be. Also understand that a sheepdog is a funny critter: He is always sniffing around out on the perimeter, checking the breeze, barking at things that go bump in the night, and yearning for a righteous battle. That is, the young sheepdogs yearn for a righteous battle. The old sheepdogs are a little older and wiser, but they move to the sound of the guns when needed right along with the young ones.
Here is how the sheep and the sheepdog think differently. The sheep pretend the wolf will never come, but the sheepdog lives for that day. After the attacks on September 11, 2001, most of the sheep, that is, most citizens in America said, “Thank God I wasn’t on one of those planes.” The sheepdogs, the warriors, said, “Dear God, I wish I could have been on one of those planes. Maybe I could have made a difference.” When you are truly transformed into a warrior and have truly invested yourself into warriorhood, you want to be there. You want to be able to make a difference.
There is nothing morally superior about the sheepdog, the warrior, but he does have one real advantage. Only one. And that is that he is able to survive and thrive in an environment that destroys 98 percent of the population.
There was research conducted a few years ago with individuals convicted of violent crimes. These cons were in prison for serious, predatory crimes of violence: assaults, murders and killing law enforcement officers. The vast majority said that they specifically targeted victims by body language: slumped walk, passive behavior and lack of awareness. They chose their victims like big cats do in Africa, when they select one out of the herd that is least able to protect itself.
Some people may be destined to be sheep and others might be genetically primed to be wolves or sheepdogs. But I believe that most people can choose which one they want to be, and I’m proud to say that more and more Americans are choosing to become sheepdogs.
Seven months after the attack on September 11, 2001, Todd Beamer was honored in his hometown of Cranbury, New Jersey. Todd, as you recall, was the man on Flight 93 over Pennsylvania who called on his cell phone to alert an operator from United Airlines about the hijacking. When he learned of the other three passenger planes that had been used as weapons, Todd dropped his phone and uttered the words, “Let’s roll,” which authorities believe was a signal to the other passengers to confront the terrorist hijackers. In one hour, a transformation occurred among the passengers – athletes, business people and parents. — From sheep to sheepdogs and together they fought the wolves, ultimately saving an unknown number of lives on the ground.
“Do you have any idea how hard it would be to live with yourself after that?”
“There is no safety for honest men except by believing all possible evil of evil men.” – Edmund Burke
Here is the point I like to emphasize; especially to the thousands of police officers and soldiers I speak to each year. In nature the sheep, real sheep, are born as sheep. Sheepdogs are born that way, and so are wolves. They didn’t have a choice. But you are not a critter. As a human being, you can be whatever you want to be. It is a conscious, moral decision.
If you want to be a sheep, then you can be a sheep and that is okay, but you must understand the price you pay. When the wolf comes, you and your loved ones are going to die if there is not a sheepdog there to protect you. If you want to be a wolf, you can be one, but the sheepdogs are going to hunt you down and you will never have rest, safety, trust, or love. But if you want to be a sheepdog and walk the warrior’s path, then you must make a conscious and moral decision every day to dedicate, equip and prepare yourself to thrive in that toxic, corrosive moment when the wolf comes knocking at the door.
For example, many officers carry their weapons in church. They are well concealed in ankle holsters, shoulder holsters or inside-the-belt holsters tucked into the small of their backs. Anytime you go to some form of religious service, there is a very good chance that a police officer in your congregation is carrying. You will never know if there is such an individual in your place of worship, until the wolf appears to massacre you and your loved ones.
I was training a group of police officers in Texas, and during the break, one officer asked his friend if he carried his weapon in church. The other cop replied, “I will never be caught without my gun in church.” I asked why he felt so strongly about this, and he told me about a cop he knew who was at a church massacre in Ft. Worth, Texas in 1999. In that incident, a mentally deranged individual came into the church and opened fire, gunning down fourteen people. He said that officer believed he could have saved every life that day if he had been carrying his gun. His own son was shot, and all he could do was throw himself on the boy’s body and wait to die. That cop looked me in the eye and said, “Do you have any idea how hard it would be to live with yourself after that?”
Some individuals would be horrified if they knew this police officer was carrying a weapon in church. They might call him paranoid and would probably scorn him. Yet these same individuals would be enraged and would call for “heads to roll” if they found out that the airbags in their cars were defective, or that the fire extinguisher and fire sprinklers in their kids’ school did not work. They can accept the fact that fires and traffic accidents can happen and that there must be safeguards against them.
Their only response to the wolf, though, is denial, and all too often their response to the sheepdog is scorn and disdain. But the sheepdog quietly asks himself, “Do you have any idea how hard it would be to live with yourself if your loved ones were attacked and killed, and you had to stand there helplessly because you were unprepared for that day?”
It is denial that turns people into sheep. Sheep are psychologically destroyed by combat because their only defense is denial, which is counterproductive and destructive, resulting in fear, helplessness and horror when the wolf shows up.
Denial kills you twice. It kills you once, at your moment of truth when you are not physically prepared: you didn’t bring your gun, you didn’t train. Your only defense was wishful thinking. Hope is not a strategy. Denial kills you a second time because even if you do physically survive, you are psychologically shattered by your fear, helplessness, and horror at your moment of truth.
Gavin de Becker puts it like this in “Fear Less,” his superb post-9/11 book, which should be required reading for anyone trying to come to terms with our current world situation: “…denial can be seductive, but it has an insidious side effect. For all the peace of mind deniers think they get by saying it isn’t so, the fall they take when faced with new violence is all the more unsettling.”
Denial is a save-now-pay-later scheme, a contract written entirely in small print, for in the long run, the denying person knows the truth on some level.
And so the warrior must strive to confront denial in all aspects of his life, and prepare himself for the day when evil comes.
If you are warrior who is legally authorized to carry a weapon and you step outside without that weapon, then you become a sheep, pretending that the bad man will not come today. No one can be “on” 24/7, for a lifetime. Everyone needs down time. But if you are authorized to carry a weapon, and you walk outside without it, just take a deep breath, and say this to yourself… “Baa.”
This business of being a sheep or a sheep dog is not a yes-no dichotomy. It is not an all-or-nothing, either-or choice. It is a matter of degrees, a continuum. On one end is an abject, head-in-the-sand-sheep and on the other end is the ultimate warrior. Few people exist completely on one end or the other. Most of us live somewhere in between. Since 9-11 almost everyone in America took a step up that continuum, away from denial. The sheep took a few steps toward accepting and appreciating their warriors, and the warriors started taking their job more seriously. The degree to which you move up that continuum, away from sheephood and denial, is the degree to which you and your loved ones will survive, physically and psychologically, at your moment of truth.
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Warriors, Once, and Always
By Brian D. Hoffner
In antiquity those that excelled in warfare first made themselves unconquerable. Being unconquerable lies with yourself; being conquerable lies with the enemy. Thus one who excels in warfare is able to make himself unconquerable, but cannot necessarily cause the enemy to be unconquerable. One who cannot be victorious assumes a defensive posture; one who can be victorious attacks. The combat of the victorious is like the sudden release of a pent up torrent down a thousand fathom gorge.
Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Through history there have always been those tasked with the protection of their people, to maintain order, enforce laws, and fight the enemy. Whether they were centurions, knights, soldiers, or policemen, there were those who stood out, those who had something special. They were and they are the leaders, the strongest, the fastest, the best. They stand above the rest…they are the warriors.
Warriors are those who jump from the frying pan into the fire, not because they are without fear but because they feel they must. They do not choose the path of least resistance they choose the long uphill road to achievement. Warriors do not fear the fight, but they are disciplined in their work and in their life. They suffer and sweat to become stronger and better and they seek information to educate their minds. They are never satisfied and they constantly strive to improve. Warriors excel.
Who are these warriors? They are not everyone. They are not the entire army or the entire force of men. They are what I call the six per-centers. Historically only six percent of the entire force or army were those who actually fought with a vengeance to win the battles. The other ninety four-percent were reluctant participants and/or less enthusiastic combatants, and many were merely just there. Luckily the six per-centers were also there, to bring them together, lead them, by example, to victory. This unwritten rule of six per-centers can be applied to most armies, law enforcement organizations, and even private companies. Successful companies led by executive officers are typically the six per-centers and are driven by the same warrior spirit. Think about it. How many successful company executives do you see that are fat, sloppy, and unmotivated? Why is the company loaded with employees that are not self-motivated to climb the corporate latter?
The world is populated primarily with average people swimming in a sea of mediocrity. They are content to complete their workday, go home and lay on the couch and eat a bag of Fritos. They look forward to the weekend when they can lay on the couch and eat some more Fritos. There is nothing wrong with being one of those who maintain a life of mediocrity; the world needs them too. But, they are not the six per-centers. They are not the warriors. The warriors… they stand above.
Law enforcement is no different. Every division of a police department has those who stand out. From patrol through investigations to specialized units, there are those who are extremely good at getting the job done. Some of these officers are still un-satisfied with their role within the department and want to do more. They are the six percent that feel a need to do more, to be more and to take more risks. They want to be where the action is and where the fight will be. They have the warrior spirit within them. Where do these people go within their organizations go to become the ultimate warrior? In the army they make the progression through the Airborne Ranger, Green Beret, and Delta. A Marine may become Sniper or force Recon. In the Navy they are the SEALS. In the Air Force they may be Para Rescue. In the Police Department they are SWAT! They are tactical officers that operate in situations that require them to be warriors, warriors behind the badge!
What draws an officer to become a SWAT operator? Why do certain civilians want to be so much more? Is it testosterone? We know that those with higher levels of testosterone are aggressive, bold, and focused. According to Jim Dabbs PhD, Georgia State University, Those with high levels of testosterone "were always raring to take action, and they could become intensely absorbed in a task without becoming distracted." The more testosterone you have the more dominant you’re likely to be and the less crap you’ll take from others. Testosterone also helps you build muscle, burn fat, maintain strong bones, even grow a decent beard. So it is likely that testosterone has something to do with a one’s persona and it is certainly an "A Type" personality that excels as a tactical operator, but it is not testosterone only and you don’t have to be a bearded woman to be a hell of a warrior.
There is something deep inside the warrior that drives him, that pushes him and cannot be explained scientifically. It is not just spirit and desire, but an extreme level spirit and desire…a Warrior Spirit! Not everybody has the spirit of the warrior, but those that do are exceptional. There is an uncharted fraternity of these people. It is a very exclusive, one can’t just join, and one can be accepted into this fraternity, only; if they possess that intangible warrior quality - the right stuff.
It is an honor to be a member of this exclusive fraternity. I am a trainer of warriors and a student of warriors. I am blessed with the opportunity to train warriors, to learn from warriors, and to evolve with them. You would be hard pressed to find a smarter, more fit, more motivated bunch of thirty to fifty year old men and women on the face of this planet. Beyond the wonderful toys, that we call equipment is the company we keep and not the paltry sum that we earn that makes us rich. It is the people we know, the things that we accomplish, and how we feel about ourselves that truly makes us wealthy.
It is with a surge of adrenaline and pride when I have the opportunity to train with the best. As I teach, I will continue to learn because we all have much to share. Because of our characteristics, we will be offered challenges and opportunities. Because we are warriors we will not fear them. Teddy Roosevelt, the eternal warrior and fighting man, once said…
"The credit belongs to those people who are actually in the arena who know the great enthusiasms, the great devotions to a worthy cause; who at best, know the triumphs of high achievement; and who, at worst, fail while daring greatly…so that their place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat."
True warriors aren’t made; they are born to become warriors. They are a special breed with special character and the determination to be over and above the norm. A warrior’s destiny is inevitable. Once a warrior, always a warrior, it does not go away….Warriors, once, and always.
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Code of the Warrior
by Brian D. Hoffner
"Accept the challenges so that you may feel the EXHILARATION OF VICTORY!" — George S. Patton
There is a certain code that warriors live by. Living this code is certainly a challenge, but not without reward, and the reward is extreme. For many warriors it is an unwritten code that is a natural product of their being. Though this code may not have been specifically taught to all by some almighty warrior sensei, much of the code is passed from father to son through generations of rearing him to become a person that is a stronger, better version of the father himself. I remember the many lessons of my father, and they will stay with me forever. Much of the code comes from what makes the warrior in the first place; it is an innate product of the warrior, and it is very much the content of his character. Much like the Ten Commandments of the Old Testament that dictate how mankind shall live his life, the Ten Commandments of the warrior code is how the warrior lives, thinks, trains, and wins. The following are words to live by, literally.
Focus
This is a very broad and significant category. In order to be focused, one must be paying attention. All of our training will mean little if we do not perceive the things that are happening around us. It would be little comfort to know that I am a great shot as I lay in the pool of my own blood… if I had just been paying more attention I would have had the opportunity to do something. Referring to Jeff Copper color codes we must spend our days in yellow at a minimum. There is no room in today’s world for color code white, particularly as a warrior, so pay attention, remain in the present, live in the now. It’s the only place that anything is really happening. Focus is determination as well as composure. Sheer grit determination can carry us far and give us the winning edge; At the same time we must remain composed. We are expected to control the situation but we must first control ourselves. We must keep our emotions such as anger and fear, in check. The ability to win is 99 per-cent mental, the fight is 99 per-cent mental. Your brain will allow you to win or cause you to lose…You choose.
Think Ahead
Have a plan. Know what you’re going to do, how you’re going to do it, and of course why. Think ahead, think of the "what ifs". Think about what you will do if the "what if" takes place. It’s difficult to put a plan into action when you do not have a plan to begin with. It should be noted that we are under no obligation to wait for the "what if" to happen before we act. It could be a situation that if we wait to see if it happens…its too late. We are allowed to act before the "what if" takes place as long as we act reasonably, and of course do not violate civil rights. We must be thinking "why" because it is our justification and we will be required to articulate that very point to the world. So as we stay focused…Think ahead.
No Whining
Take your lumps without whining. Nobody wants to hear it. Nobody cares. Whining makes you appear weak and if you do it enough you will start believing that you are weak. So don’t do it! It’s ugly, it’s shameful, it will earn you no respect.
Take Responsibility
We and we only are responsible for our actions. Just as we are responsible for every bullet that leaves the muzzle of our weapon. We are responsible for everything we say and every thing that we do. We are responsible for our own success or failure. Making excuses is kin to whining so take responsibility. It’s your life, own it! Or blame someone else for it…You choose again.
Don’t Take Any Abuse
Stand up to your foes. External foes are others who attempt to abuse us in one way or another, don’t let it happen. Foes who abuse or attack us physically are easy for the warrior to defeat. It is the sly dogs that attempt to abuse us mentally, beat us down a little at a time, that we must be aware of and defeat. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Even tougher, don’t take any abuse from your internal foes. What are they? They are the demons within us that prey on our being and try to make us under achievers, hold us down, and perhaps…destroy us. The lazy Demon will keep you from reaching your true potential. The Comfort Demon can prevent you from taking a risk that needs taking. Ego can make you take risks not worth taking. Satisfaction can impede your progress. Blind trust can get you stabbed in the back. Fear can make you freeze when you’re being counted on. Lack of fear can make you jump off a roof. Whoever or whatever your foes may be, whether external or internal, stand up to them…the cost is too great not to.
Just Do It
Hard choices temper our strength and our integrity; they make the difference between a life of mediocrity and a life of excellence. Choose the arena; don’t fear it. You know what is right, choose it and do it. It’s the right thing.
Keep Your Word
A warrior is only as good as his or her word. We build self-trust and trust in others by keeping our word. We earn respect and honor by keeping our word. If we say it, it’s as good as done. You could lose everything, but your word may never be taken from you. It is the one thing you cannot afford to lose…Keep it!
Keep Your Sense of Humor
Smell the roses along the way, have a good time in life. Be goal oriented, bust your butt to get there, but enjoy the road along the way. A sense of humor shows confidence and relieves stress for you and others. It makes the world go around just a little bit better.
Train to Win
You may be a member of a full-time tactical team that trains daily or Competitive club that meets regularly. Whatever your situation is you must train to win. We must give it all we’ve got each and every time we train. We operate as we train, therefore; if we train with less than one hundred percent; we operate and fight, at less than one hundred percent. Why give the edge to the bad guy? We must train the way we fight because we will fight like we train. Give it your best effort and do not practice improper technique. It takes hundreds upon thousands of repetitions to make a technique reflexive, then it must be maintained, or it will go away. Most skills will perish without practice. We know when we train physically we must train hard to make gains. When training physically or mentally; train proper, train hard, train to win, and train some more.
Discipline
A warrior is not afraid of discipline. A warrior is made of discipline. We must eat, think, sleep, speak, study, train, and act with discipline. As warriors we live a life of discipline. Let’s face it…without discipline, we are just a poor dumb slob swimming in that sea of mediocrity, and mediocrity is a dead end…it gets us no-where fast. Discipline will make all the right things happen.
Live with Passion, Fight with a Vengeance
Give it your all. Set your path, enjoy the scenery along the way, but if your path is crossed with the fight, fight with a vengeance. Losing is not an option. You only live once. Give it all you’ve got, nothing less, and make your mark. No regrets! You will sleep well at night.
Never, Ever…Quit!
No matter how tough. No matter how painful. Never, ever quit!
Summary
I have spoken of the lessons of my father and how this code is passed from generation to generation. I do not have a son to pass these lessons to, but my two daughters are tough, strong, smart, and quite prepared to conquer their own world. The world of warriors is not restricted to men. Woman have more barriers to hurdle but it must be done. Today’s soccer moms must be tomorrow’s warriors. As mothers become warriors they in turn pass it on to their children. I know my girls, in time, will pass much of what I taught them to their children. The lessons of a father to his children are a valued and treasured gift. The last lesson of my father I learned during his recent death. As he lay on his deathbed after a valiant and courageous fight against the unbeatable leukemia that eventually consumed his body he continued to show grit and determination. He refused to show pain or complain about his life’s end. He was concerned only of his family and determined to comfort us all. I learned so much from my father much of which is relayed through my training program. Perhaps the greatest gift my father gave me was the strength and perseverance he had his entire life and the dignity with which he died. Even in death my father was remarkable. Dad, you will forever inspire me to live the code of the warrior, thank you.
The code of the warrior is the content of your character. If you have practiced these Ten Warrior Codes most of your life than you probably have noticed that you are a bit different than most folks. It is OK to be different, not average, not treading water in the sea of mediocrity. It is good to be above the rest. That is why you are a warrior in the position that you are. You are the sheepdog not the sheep. The sheep will ridicule the sheep dog behind his or her back. But when the wolf is at the door the sheep flock to the sheepdog lest they bow to the mercy of the wolf and become wolf feed. So when they ridicule, when they criticize, just smile, and know, that you…the sheepdog, the warrior, can tear off the head of that wolf, whomever he may be, and spit down his neck, if need be.
Warriors, as you live your life, you will be a role model to many. Your children will respect you and aspire to be more like you as they mature. Your legacy will become theirs as they pass it on to their children. One hundred years from now no one will remember the car that you drove, the clothes you wore, or the house that you lived in, but if you had an impact on just one person, one life…then your life was worth it. Give it all you’ve got, live the code of the warrior.
"Don’t just dream of success… wake up and bust your ass to achieve it!" — Brian D. Hoffner
